In the beginning of the novel, Gogol is unappreciative of his Bengali roots and his parents wishes. He makes decisions that are against his culture. He even questions the important of a pet name even though, as his mother describes, 'Its what Bengalis do' (Lahiri 99). In addition, he dates American women even though Bengalis simply do not date, they have arranged marriages with other Bengalis. And even though a family is of high importance in Bengali culture, he attends universities and takes jobs that are as far away from his family as possible and makes excuses to not visit them. Months pass and despite his parents pleads he does not make the effort to visit them even to spend time with an Maxines American family.
A turning point to how Gogol makes decisions is when his father passes away and Gogol begins to value his family more. He takes trips home most weekends and spends some time with his sister lonely mother. He even dates a Bengali women, Moushimi, where as before his fathers death he would have never even considered to call her and ask her out.
Moushimi similarly was was a rebellious Bengali at one point in her life. When she was younger she was obedient to her parents however she secretly despised certain traditions she obeyed. For instance, she even swore when she was twelve "never too marry a Bengali man", however, now she is married to an bengali man, Gogol. As she became older she began to go against her parents wishes. Even though "at her parents' insistence, she'd majored in chemistry [...] Without telling them, she'd pursued a double major in French" (Lahiri 214).
I guess it is a common for American children with non American roots to go against their culture in order to "fit in" to the American society. However many do not realize that they can assimilate their long lived traditions into another culture.
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